
I have a new job. My apartment's a mess. I have church activities and a social life. Oh yeah - and I'm getting married in less than eight months and have yet to really even begin making arrangements. And somewhere in there I'm supposed to fit making art. Boy do I feel like I'm failing at that.
I'm still working on the same piece - well, actually that's not accurate. I'm still NOT working on the same piece. Which is lame, because I have it all figured out, I just need to DO it. I don't know how I'm going to be able to go forward with this and finish the other things I've started, let alone projects for the future, which are supposed to include a 12" x 12" piece of one of the Stations of the Cross. (People who read this are probably going to think I'm a "Christian Artist." Ha.)
The truth is, while I have technically have time to accomplish everything, I feel so overwhelmed by the sheer weight of it all that I sort of shut down and don't want to do anything. Which just puts me further behind.
* * *

David invited me for a helicopter ride today. Complete with a simulated hydraulic failure. Can you say "Bumpy ride?" ("Bumpy ride!") Good job, kids. With my luck the instructor will throw in a surprise auto-rotation drill, too. Barf bag time (I'm not too good with the whole "free-fall" thing...which is why you never see me on roller coasters).
I want to go, and I'm very excited about supporting my brother in his (hopefully) new career, however it's supposed be rainy and very windy about the time the flight is scheduled, so I'm not sure it's even going to happen. If it doesn't, I guess I'll just be home doing the dishes...so we have something to eat off of.
[UPDATE: I did go, and it was awesome. David is such a smooth pilot that I couldn't figure out when he was turning off the hydraulics. The weather held steady, there were no surprise auto-rotations, and I took pictures from the air. My bro IS an amazing pilot!]* * *

Monica and I watched "My Kid Could Paint That" the other day. Aside from the controversies about the nature and validity of modern art and whether or not the kid actually did the paintings herself (and seriously, who cares if Dad gave her a little guidance), it got me thinking about the pretentiousness of the art world - something that comes back to me every now and then.
Honestly, the artists, writers, musicians, performers...well, really
anybody that I've really admired have always done what they do for the sheer joy of it. They don't care if others approve or like their work - or if they even make money. They just can't imagine doing anything else. I wish we could wash away the cynicism of the (art) world for good, and just do what we do for the love of what we do.
I think the problem is - and I'm fully aware there lots of artists who
should learn something about the "business" of art - that money has become way too important to many artists, critics, and the public. Art has just become another commodity to be consumed. I'd like to be successful as an artist, but on my
own terms...whatever that means. I'll let you know when I've figured it out.
Kill yr. idols.
[UPDATE: Thinking further on this, I work with developmentally disabled artists, and it's AMAZING what they do. The whole concept of a "gifted" artist or a prodigy is really a label the public pushes on artists, when I truly believe anyone can express themselves through art. We need an art liberation movement. Viva!]Labels: Art, Helicopter, Movies, Work
Take care, Jaron and Monica. MaryAnn